1 Year Post-Donation

Wow! It's been a year since I donated my kidney. It's hard to believe. I honestly can say that I'm healthier today than I was one year ago. A lot of that is b/c of my change of attitude and perspective towards life. Part of it is b/c I'm taking better care of myself and part of it has to be that God is watching over me; at least I'd like to think so.

Other than 5 scars on my abdomen and side, there is no trace of a missing organ. There is no negative change in my life, only positive. There is no regret. Only hope for all of those that are still waiting.

I'm am very happy to report that Masud (the recipient of my kidney) is doing EXTREMELY well! I talk or email at least once every month/every few weeks. They have sent me some pictures of the past year. I thought I'd share them with everyone:

This is a picture taken this summer '09 in
Masud's pool with his boys

This was taken this summer of Maheeb,

Masud's son. What a cutie!

Here's another picture of Masud and his son,

Maheeb, by his pool this summer.

Maheeb being silly!

I'm guessing this was taken in the Fall of '08,

right after his surgery, when they visited

Bangladesh (home).

Masud and Maheeb

This is Masud's older son, Farib, in their pool.

Masud all dressed up. He looks great! It makes

me so happy!

This is a picture of Masud's baby boy, Maheeb,

after graduating from Preschool! Good job Maheeb!

"11 months post-op"

Wow! I can't believe it's been almost an entire year since I donated my kidney to Masud. I almost want to cry looking back on the wonderful, amazing year that I've had. I have been blessed in so many ways!
I'm happy to report that Masud is doing wonderful with my/his new kidney! Both of our Creatinine levels are about 1.2. That's within normal range. So, as he starts his new life, I pray every day that he gets another one to spend with those precious little boys of his and his wife, Sharmin, who I've grown to love like a sister.
I just wish there was some way I could afford to visit them in Phoenix again soon!

If you have any questions, email me at melswanson502@yahoo.com

Update: 4.5 months post-op

Well, it's been about 4.5 months since I donated my kidney. I wanted to update those of you that read this regularly. I haven't written in a while, and I apologize. Things have been a little hectic.
About 3 full months after the surgery, I finally started feeling like myself again. The only thing I've noticed is that I've gained some weight. I think it's b/c I was really tired for a while and didn't do much.
Now, I have my energy completely back. I feel great! I haven't gone for my 3 month check-up yet to check my Creatinine and blood pressure. I really need to do that. I will after the holidays. The last time I had my Creatinine checked, it was still pretty high. it's supposed to come down after 3 months though.
I also wanted to mention that if anyone is interested in talking to me about the donation process and/or how to find someone to donate to please email me at melswanson502@yahoo.com. That's my new email address. I'll be glad to walk you through the entire process. I still, to this day, get emails from new people asking how the whole thing will play out.

"Update on 11-month-old needing liver"

I wanted to update everyone on the last post. I let everyone know that there was a family looking for a liver for their 11-month old boy.

I have wonderful news!

The night of this post, early in the morning, he received a cadaver liver.

The last I talked to the family, he was doing well.

Thank you to everyone that contacted me regarding this. I'm sure I'll be contacted about more in the future.

Melissa

"Should I Donate?"

Hey everyone! I wanted to update everyone on what's going on in my life. I've gotten a lot of emails from readers asking how I'm doing and what's going on. I really appreciate people caring enough to check on me. Keep sending me emails. My email address is melswanson@gannett.com. There really hasn't been a whole lot of change since the last post. I'm doing very well. I can't complain. Othere than being tired, I'm not having any major complications.

I've had several people contact me b/c they're thinking of being a live donor. If anyone is interested in learning more about the donation process and how it works, feel free to email me. I will be glad to help you out in any way I can. My goal is to bring as much attention to living organ donation as possible.

I got the most heartbreaking email yesterday. A lady wrote me asking if I would consider donating part of my liver to her 11-month old son that's dying of liver failure. Unfortunately, liver failure is very progressive with no real treatment. So, he doesn't have much time. It is possible to donate part of your liver and your liver will regenerate itself. They put part of your liver in the recipient, and it also grows to a full liver. Anyway, it broke my heart to have to tell her that I was not able to donate part of mine at this time. I can't even consider something like that for another year. I wouldn't pass the tests since I just donated part of my kidney. Otherwise, I would definitely do it.

The little boys blood type is A+. So, if you're type A or type 0, you may be able to donate. If absolutely anyone that reads this is interested in learning more about donation or donating to this child, PLEASE contact me. I am working on getting some pictures and more information about the family. All I know right now is that they will probably be sent to Children's Hospital in Dallas if he gets a transplant.

I told the family that I would help them find a donor. So, I'm going to post updated information as I get it. PLEASE email me at any time with questions.

Melissa

"Update: 5 weeks post kidney donation"

Hi again! I wanted to update everyone on what's going on post-transplant. I have been moving for the past 2 weeks and haven't had much time to blog.

I've had one scare recently with dehydration, but nothing too serious. Honestly, I'm doing very well considering all the stuff I'm able to do now. I'm pretty good at overdoing it too soon. I did that after this surgery and paid for it for a while. Now, things are much better.

I've talked to Masud and his wife, Sharmin, several times recently. Masud is doing very well! He gave me some really good news 2 days ago. He said that he was able to play with his kids for the first time in a long time. That almost made me cry. It was so important to his older son for him to be able to do that. Anyway, he's doing great! His kidney levels are in normal range (on the high side of normal). The doctor's said they are very happy with his progress. He's no longer having pain and not too tired anymore.

"Update: 3 weeks post kidney donation"

Hey everyone! I haven't written in a week or so b/c I've been busy trying to catch up at work. I'm also busy packing b/c we're moving soon. I'm not moving away; just to a new house. I know, I know....bad timing. I'm great at that, lol.
So, the only thing that's changed since the last post is that I'm getting better each day. I'm finding that I tire very easily, but that's expected. Until my kidney functions gets back to normal, I will be tired a lot. I should be back to normal in about 3 months or so. It's a small price to pay for someone's life, so I try not to complain too much.
I appreciate all of you that have sent me your well wishes, kind thoughts, and especially for those of you that prayed. Where would we be without prayer? I don't even want to think about it.
In other news........My baby started Kindergarten yesterday. I thought for sure that I would cry. But, I surprised myself. Instead, I dropped him off and told him to have a seat. Then, I turned around and ran as fast as I could, LOL!

"The Times Story"

I forgot to add this story to my blog. The Shreveport Times did some short stories a while back. This is one of them:

http://www.shreveporttimes.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20080806/NEWS01/808060363

"Pictures from the surgery"

I wanted to let everyone know that I'm now home and doing very well. I wanted to share some pictures from my "trip". Here goes:

Here's a picture taken of Masud (the recipient), left, and his friend at the hospital right before surgery.









This picture is, from left to right, of me, Masud, and my aunt Carolyn right before surgery. Sorry, I wasn't allowed to wear make-up.










This picture is of, from left to right, me, Masud, my aunt Carolyn, and Sharmin (Masud's wife).










This picture was taken after they took Masud and I to the pro-op area. That is my aunt Carolyn, me, and Sharmin. You can see Masud over to the far right of the picture. We were all cracking up and making lots of jokes. It was great!










This was also taken in pre-op. It was seconds before they wheeled me out for surgery. I told them I wanted to walk, but they wouldn't let me, lol. Notice how puffy my face is? That's b/c they pumped me full of fluids before the surgery. It's supposed to help Masud somehow. I guess they need to see if it will produce urine. He looked so sick.










This picture was taken 2 days after surgery. I had been released the night before. Masud was released the next day.










Here's a picture of Masud and my aunt Carolyn the same day. Masud's color had gotten so much better.










This picture was taken a 5 days after surgery. We all got together with Masud's friends to have a thank-you/farewell party. There were over 30 people there. I was so touched. Everyone was super nice! In this picture you see Sharmin, my aunt, me and some friends. I don't remember everyone's name b/c there were so many people.










I was presented a plaque from the Bangladesh Association of Phoenix, Arizona thanking for for my gift. The plaque reads:
"Dear Melissa Swanson,
You have touched the heart of our community with the uniqe gift of life. You will be remembered forever with love and gratitude." I cried pretty soon after this picture was taken.

"Kidney Donation: Day 4"

Well, today is the 4th day after the operation. It's also the first day that I've felt really good. I'm still having pain (obviously), but I got out and went shopping in two stores today. I felt like I really needed to get out. I got a burst of energy today.
I'm starting to realize that it's important to rest a lot the first couple of days after surgery, but then you really need to get moving. It's been hard for me to walk a lot b/c we're in a hotel room. I just sit around watching tv or web surfing or working.
Now that I realize I can get out and do stuff, I think I'll get better. This will hopefully help with the soreness. I've only had to take one pain pill today, which is really good. I'll probably only take one more at bedtime. Yippee! I'm finally turning the corner.
Please keep Masud in your prayers.

"A Wonderful Surprise"

Today has been a great day! It started off with a little pain and a lot of sleepiness. However, I got a great surprise today.

Masud and his wife, Sharmin, and their son, Maheeb (4) showed up at my hotel room to surprise me. Masud had just been discharged from the hospital. It's only been 3 days since the transplant. It's absolutely amazing that he's doing so well. I don't think he was kicked out of the hospital. I think he was really ready to leave.

This entire experience has been one miracle after another. I'm amazed every single day. Masud was originally supposed to be on at least 20 medications to prevent rejection after the surgery. He left the hospital today with only 2 anti-rejection medications. They doctors said that they were simply amazed by what a perfect match we were. They told us that we were a better match than most siblings. That's why they think he's healing so fast.

While they were visiting me, Sharmin grabbed my hands and said, "Melissa, you have no idea what you've done. Saying thank you is just not enough. I don't know what else I can do. You have truly saved his life and changed our lives forever."

I tried to tell her that it was ok, but I kept tearing up. I never did this for any kind of thanks or attention. I simply wanted to give those children their father back. God answered all of our prayers and is now answering with an astounding "YES"!

I will keep everyone updated. Until then, please continue to pray for Masud that he will not reject the kidney.

With love,
Melissa"

"Kidney Donation Update"

Hey everyone. I just wanted to let everyone know that I've been discharged from the hospital and am back at my hotel room. I'm staying at the Hampton Inn & Suites in Scottsdale, AZ. It's only been about 34 hours since the surgery. I was up out of the bed 30 minutes after coming out of the recovery room. Those of you that know me know that I'm pretty stubborn. I'm having some pain, but it's a small price to pay. Honestly, I'm doing great!
Masud Khondoker (the kidney recipient) is also doing great! The doctors said that when they removed my left kidney, it was one of the largest, healthiest ones they'd ever seen. As soon as they put the kidney in Masud, he started producing large amounts of urine. By the time he got to his room, he already looked 100% better than before surgery. His skin had gotten very dark and blotchy b/c of the toxins in his blood. Now his skin is back to normal. Almost all of his kidney tests are completely normal.
I've also passed all of my tests. The only restrictions I have are to not play any contact sports ever (no problem with that) and don't take Ibuprofen if possible. I can live with that. Of course, I can't lift anything for a couple of months.
Anyway, I just wanted to let everyone know that I'm ok, he's ok, and I'm already "back to work" from my hotel room. Thank you for all your prayers!
Melissa Swanson

So far, so good

Surgery Day:

Everything's fine. When Masud received the kidney, it started producing urine immediately. He may get to go home in three days. Melissa will get to fly back home August 13th.

So far, so good.

Posted by Stephanie Bemrose, coworker.

"On the News-KTAL"

Here is a video feed that KTAL has posted on their website about this kidney donation. I was interviewed today in my home.

http://arklatexhomepage.com/media_player.php?media_id=24151

"Kidney Donation Video"

This is a video that I did about the kidney donation for The Times:

"The Waiting Game"

Well, I went and had my blood tests done today. I won't find out for a couple of days if we passed or not. I did have an interesting day. A photographer from The Times went with me to have the bloodwork done. The ladies at the lab and I got to have our pictures taken.

I also went back to The Times photo studio and had a video made to go on their website. Some time this week, they will be doing a story for the paper. I'm just trying to get the word out about kidney donation. A lot of people don't realize that it's even a possibility to donate to a stranger.

There are probably a lot of people that would never think about it, but there are many that would. To me, it's worth the embarrassment of media attention to get even one person to donate.

For now, I just wait again. I'll let everyone know as soon as I hear if the surgery is a go. I hope this is the last time I have to wait. It's hard.

To leave a comment, click HERE.

"Awaiting Last Cross-Match"

I've been sitting here at my computer all evening reading people's stories about kidney donation. I'll tell you one thing. It's something that can give you a good feeling and scare the you know what out of you at the same time.

For the most part, the stories I've read have been nothing but beautiful. Most people have no problems.

The one thing that is worrying me is that people have come as far as the final cross-match (done 2 weeks before the scheduled surgery to make sure neither of us have developed new antibodies against each other) and failed. Masud and I have already had a cross-match blood test done and were a match.

I just read a story about someone that was a match and got to the final cross-match and it showed that they were not a match anymore. One of them had developed new antibodies since the first one. To me, that's horrible.

We've come so far. I don't want to let anyone down. I know I've done all I can. I guess I just need more prayers to make sure that this blood test goes ok. Please say a prayer for Masud and I, Melissa.

Monday is the day of the test. I am going to be going to a local hospital to have it done. As if that's not enough pressure, I'm having a photographer/videographer follow me (from our local newspaper, where I work) to take pictures and video. I have no idea what I'm going to say on the video. I'm definitely not a public speaker. I'm not shy, but it's not an interview. It will just be me talking for 1 or 2 minutes. Help! LOL!

I think that after this test, I'll finally be able to truly relax. I've been in pucker-mode ever since the first email that was exchanged between the recipient and I. It can be a stressful process. It's nothing I can't handle though. I'm pretty tough. I just want to give a true account of this whole process for my readers.

There may be people that are thinking of donating that read this. I want them to see the bad as well as the good. Mostly, this is a positive experience. It's just hard waiting to hear the results each time you have a test done. The days leading up to the tests, you get nervous. I have a very strong feeling of "I can't let this family down". I know that it's not in my control, but it's something that most people go through. It's normal from what I've read and been told.

Well, all I want is for everyone to keep praying. For now, just pray that the cross-match test shows that Masud and I are still a match.

I love all of you and thank you for your prayers so far.

Melissa

If you have any questions, please feel free to comment HERE or email me at melswanson502@yahoo.com.

"Questions Answered"

I have been asked to post my answers to some very frequently asked questions. This will help everyone understand better as to why I decided to do this.

1. Are you getting money for donating.

No. I am not receiving any money or gifts for this. It’s against the law. I’m simply doing this to help.

2. How much money is it costing YOU?

All of the flight, hotel, and rental car expenses are being paid by the recipient. This is something that not all recipients can afford to do. Some donors opt to pay that themselves, but I’m not in the position to do so. As far as work goes, I don’t anticipate missing much work b/c I’m taking my laptop with me. I’ll only be in the hospital 1 or 2 days. After that, I’ll be working from my hotel room.

3. How much time do you think this will cost you?

Wow. This is a hard question. I’ve never sat down and figured it all out. I would guess that by the time I’m done with the surgery and follow-up appointments, it will have taken me about 24 days worth of emailing back and forth, taking blood tests, traveling, surgery, and follow-up appointments. As far time off from work, it won’t be much. I’m lucky enough to have a job where I work from home on a computer. I can easily do most of my job from Phoenix. For someone that’s considering doing this and they don’t have the luxury of working from home, it could be a problem. They have to make sure that their boss is supportive of their decision and potential time off from work. I would say that they would miss an average of about 4 weeks total for testing and recovery; possibly more.
If you count time I've spend researching kidney donation, it's more like 40 days.

4. What do your boys think about it? Do they have different feelings about it due to their ages?

When I first approached my boys about this, they said, “What is that?” They didn’t even know what a kidney was. I showed a picture of it to them on the computer. I explained how I had two good ones and this man had no good ones and that I was just going to share one of my extra ones. My 8 year old son said, “That’s nice of you mommy.” My 5 year old said, “Yuck!” So, there is definitely a difference in intellectual understanding between the two of them. They have both been through surgeries with me before; even more major than this one. They know that mommy is pretty tough. They actually seem to be proud of me.

5. Have you thought about what would happen should one of your four boys need a kidney one day? What made you decide to donate even though they might need a kidney one day?

Yes, I have thought of that. It’s a question that I’ve been asked my many people. We don’t have kidney disease or diabetes in our family, so the likelihood of either of them having kidney disease is slim. They could have some kind of traumatic injury that could cause it. I’m the kind of person that believes that God must have given us two kidneys so that we could help others that don’t have a good one. I can’t withhold helping a sick person now just b/c one of my children MIGHT need one later. We have a large family, and I feel certain that we would have no trouble finding another kidney for my child. Plus, with the anti-rejections drugs that are available today, you don’t even have to be a perfect match.

6. You are a mom of four boys. There's always 'danger' in surgery. What pushed you toward this decision to donate despite that?

I am married. My husband is in the Air Force and is currently stations in Kuwait until the end of September. Since my two step-sons live with their own mother, that’s not a concern. They will be taken care of. My boys will naturally go live with their father if something should happen to me during surgery. I know that they will be well taken care of and loved as much as I love them. It will be hard on them, but I hope that they would be proud of me anyway. If it’s God’s will for me to die donating a kidney, I’m ok with that. I have complete confidence in the doctors and staff at Mayo Clinic in Phoenix. It’s one of the best transplant hospitals in the country. They have not lost even one donor yet. That’s good enough odds for me.

7. What are the ethical issues, if any, you've dealt with and how did you resolve them?

The ethical issues I’ve dealt with are that I’m donating to a “stranger”. I put stranger in quotations because I feel like I’ve known this family forever. I originally met them on LivingDonorsOnline.org. So, ethicists wonder why someone would go out of their way to donate an organ to someone they don’t know. What benefit would I get from it? With a family member or friend, you get the benefit of having them around longer. With a stranger, you don’t get that. For me, the simple thought of being able to help someone is my benefit. My feet haven’t touched the ground ever since I found out we were a match. All I want out of this is simply to help another human being.
One other ethical question I’ve been asked is “Do you think you’re playing God by choosing your donor directly?”. My answer is no. I don’t. I feel like I used the avenue that was available to me. It was either that or not at all, because I didn’t know of another way at the time. I knew there was a National Registry, but it costs about $75-80 to be tested, and the donor has to pay. I just couldn’t afford it. I feel like God would be proud that I’m helping, plain and simple.

"The Cause"

Some people ask me why I'm doing this. This is a question that I've answered many times. I am simply doing it to help another person in need. I've always been a giving person. This just seems natural to me. It won't significantly affect my life, so why not?

Why am I blogging about this? It helps to answer many of my family and friends questions about kidney donation. Also, I'm hoping that it will bring attention to people in hopes that more people will come forward and donate.

I feel that there are a lot of people out there with big hearts that would be more than happy to donate to someone if they knew someone that needed one. Well, only a small percent of people know someone that needs a kidney, yet there are so many out there that do. There are also many that die each day waiting for a matching kidney that never comes. It's a needless and preventable death. Many of these people are children, mothers, fathers, grandparents, etc. It breaks my heart.

I was one of the people that wondered how I could donate to someone if I didn't know anyone that needed one. I had called the National Registry and found out that it cost money to get put on the list. It cost ME money to be tested! I didn't have it. So, I forgot about it.

It wasn't until a friend at school told me that he was waiting on a kidney that I reentertained the thought of donating. Unfortunately, we were not compatible blood types. As heartbreaking as it was to me, I knew that there had to be someone out there that I could help. To me it didn't really matter who it was.

I didn't really want to help out a serial killer or rapist, so I started looking online. That's when I found the website LivingDonorsOnline.org. This website was a Godsend to me. It was just what I had been looking for. I just needed a way to communicate with others that were searching for a kidney. So, I posted my blood type and told people that were compatible to email me. That's where it all began.

There is also a site called MatchingDonors.org that I've seen. This site works a little differently. It's more like a dating site. You get to see more about your potential recipient. They recipient has to pay a membership fee to have their profile on the site. The potential donors are free. So, the donors get on the site and look around until they find one they like.

Some say that it's ethically wrong to do it that way; that you're playing God. You're only picking people that have great computer and/or writing skills and possibly even the best looking candidate. Personally, I didn't like that site as much as the one that was more anonymous. I was willing to give my kidney to the first interested person that I got a good feeling from.

Unfortunately, there was no way of telling if the person was a serial killer or any of that. After talking to this family, the Mayo Clinic, and their friends, I feel pretty sure that he's not.

I feel very comfortable with this family and love them dearly. I feel blessed to be a part of their lives. Masud and I will forever share a bond that only he and I can understand. And, if after the surgery, he and his family decide that they want to move and and not revisit that part of their life over and over, I'm ok with not being a long-time friend as well. I will just write to make sure that he's ok. As far as I can tell, his wife, Sharmin, intends on staying friends with me. She and I bonded pretty instantly.

I also just came across a really neat site that talks about a sort of "chain donating". Click on this link to see the video:
http://www.kidneyregistry.org/

If anyone has any ethical issues that they would like to discuss with me, feel free to either leave a comment HERE or email me at melswanson502@yahoo.com.

"Another In Need"

I just came across a random blog of a man from Atlanta whose blood type is O. He is searching for anyone willing to donate that is either O+ or O-. You can click on the link below to read his blog and contact him:
http://danneedsakidney.blogspot.com/2008/05/calling-all-type-os.html